New Metal in Chemistry Chart
Name : WIFE
Symbol : Bv
Atomic Weight : -
Light when first found….tends to get heavier over the years with time
Physical
Properties: -
Boils at any time
-
Can
freeze any time
-
Melts
if treated with love & care
-
Very
Bitter if Mishandled
Chemical
Properties: -
Very Reactive
-
Highly Unstable
-
Posses
strong Affinity to Gold, Silver, Diamond, Platinum, Credit Cards & Cheque
Books.
-
Money
Reducing Agent
Occurrence : - Mostly
found in front of the Mirror
HUMOUR
– LAUGHTER FOR THE HEART
A bookseller was conducting a market
survey asked a woman: “ Madam, which book has helped you most in your life?”
The woman replied curtly, “ My husband’s cheque book!”
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A prospective husband went in a book
store and asked the sales girl; “ Miss,
do you have a book called “ Husband- Master of the House”?
Sales girl replied : “ Sir, Fiction
& Comics are on the 1st Floor! “
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Someone asked an old man: “ Even after
70 years , you still call your wife- Datling, Honey, Luv. What’s your secret to
such endearing terms?”
Old man replied: “Honestly, I forgot
her name and I’m too scared to ask her!”
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Husband said to his wife : Today is a
fine day.
Next day, he says, “ Today is a fine
day.” Again the next day, he says the same thing, “ Today is a fine day.”
Finally after a week, the wife can’t
stand it anymore and asked her husband, “ Since last week, you have been saying
”Today is a fine day”- I’m fed up. What’s the matter?”
Husband : Last week when we had an
argument, you said , “ I will leave you one fine day.” I was just trying to
remind you……….
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Wife :
Shall I prepare pork knuckles or plum sauce chicken?
Husband: First make it,
then will name it later.
A married
man’s prayer
Dear God, you gave me childhood, you
took it away
You gave me youth, you took it away,
You gave me a wife………its been years
now, just reminding You…….
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A man brings his best buddy home for
dinner unannounced at 5.30pm after work.
His wife began screaming at him and
his friend sits in and listens in:
“My hair and makeup are not done, the
house is in a mess, the dishes are no done, the laundry is still washing, I’m
still in my house pyjamas and I can’t be bothered with cooking tonight! Why the
hell did you bring him home for ?”
Husband: Because he’s thinking of
getting married.
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A man gave his wife a diamond necklace
for their anniversary and the wife did not speak to him for 6 months.
Was the necklace FAKE?
Nope! That was the deal!
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A couple was having dinner in a fancy
restaurant. As the food was served, the husband said, “ Let’s eat. The food
looks delicious and good.”
The wife said to him, “ But Honey…you
say your prayers before eating at home.” The husband replied , “ Sweetheart…here
the chefs knows how to cook and knows what they are doing…. No need for
prayers…”
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Best slogan noted on a MAN’s T-shirt :
“Please do not disturb me, I am MARRIED & already very DISTURBED! “
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