In all my growing up years, I’ve always have a certain level of respect for full time workers of places of worship. My historical religious background from young was a Buddhist but I have since been the first generation Christian in my family but that doesn’t take away the respect I have for full time workers of these religious places. I know that these people have dedicated their lives in their own religious beliefs and that is truly amazing. I must admit that some of them had displayed exceptional dedication to their religious cause and it is truly commendable. I guess, when it is someone else sons or daughters dedicating their lives to God, it is fine, right? But how do you feel and deal with that feeling when it is your own sons or daughters going into full time ministry? That is the question, isn’t it? It does prick you , doesn’t it?
I must admit in all honesty, I was floored. I know that it is an honour to serve GOD as His co-worker in the faith but somehow that nagging feeling bugs you if your son/daughter would be alright or worse still, has he/she made the right decision. I guess, that is the humanistic feeling and biological response of any parent, right? GOD does work in a mysterious way!
I remember when I was first informed of my son’s decision to go full time working in church, I was like “ Whoa, dude. For real?” All sorts of questions got jammed up in that brain of mine back then. No, it is not that the Unifi clogged up or the Streamyx lagged but mainly because the kueh teow up there in the head got shorted/fried! Not wanting to cause a chaotic line of questioning and pandemonium outbreak of emotions from the womenfolk in my family, I guess, I did what most dad would do – break it gently to the family or is it the other way round? Hmmmnnn….. I wonder. I guess, it is always hard when “concerned” relatives would ask “innocent “ questions like “what is your eldest doing these days,ah?” “ Can survive ( financially) being a full time church worker, kah?” or even “Good meh?”. Yeah, there are days I do struggle with the answers as the womenfolk in my household grasped the matter better than I did, actually.
I guess, when I courageously tell my relatives or friends on what my son is doing, their facial expression says it all, man. It is funny though, now that I think of it, how their facial expressions changes as fast as their cheek blushes. It was as though the conscious cheek was acknowledging the GOD we serve. Somehow, I wasn’t embarrassed or put off by such questions but it is hard to explain to people who has a “touch n go” situation with GOD. Meaning, they can call onto God when they need Him desperately and then goes into hibernating when they don’t need Him after the storm had subsided. I have learnt ever since that you can only plan the future but eventually, it is God who decides and determines what’s going to be done with your life.
It was only recently that during a dinner function, a friend of mine from JB asked me about my eldest/son. So, when I told him of my son's attachment to a church, he patted me on the back enthusiastically and congratulated me. I did not know if he was mocking me or genuinely happy for me then! However, when he saw my expression, he asked me to cheer up and he kept telling me that how God would provide. I did not know what he was talking about but he took me aside and said ,” Look, do not worry, brother! God would provide and He would take care of things for you and your household.” He then went on to tell me about his sister’s decision to go full time in God’s ministry despite passing out with flying colors as a doctor in her overseas studies. He laughingly told me as an encouragement that his father did not speak and refused to speak to his sister for 3 full years! He then shared how his sister’s life transformed as a missionary and later as a full time church administrator. Yeah, God has a plan for everyone. I was encouraged by that …..a lot, really.
I guess, as old as I am, I needed to hear that and needed that syringe of encouragement injection from time to time. I went back home after the dinner function digesting the nuggets of wisdom and the miraculous happenings that had happened to those who put their trust and faith in the Lord. I am so thankful for that pep talk, actually. It made me realized a lot of matters in regards to trusting our Lord with our plans.
I must admit, there was a time, I also struggled as much as any other parent would but somehow, I was comforted as I grew older and mysteriously comforted by the hands of God at my heart. Yunno, in the early days, I would confront God in my quiet time and asked “ Why, Lord? “ and then went on to ramble, rave and lunacy pleadings upon the sacrifices made, the aging process of me, the financial effort in it all , my travel plans in old age, my retirement plans etc etc…..but somehow, the answer I got was “ Why not? Didn’t you dedicate him, your first born, to me and ask of me to do as I will?”. I was floored that day, I remembered and I rendered my heart to God but not before the long protest notes and so on. It was really tough at first and I still do have questions but probably I would store them away and ask Him when I get up there someday…..when I get there!
What I want to say is that church workers are human beings too. They are a special breed of foot soldiers for God but they also do have their limitations ( physically, mentally and socially ) too. I often hear and see church workers going all out of their way to get things done and sometimes, it is heart breaking to see what they have to go through. I guess, their passion and enthusiasm to serve and to avoid being criticized as “ what type of church worker! “ made them susceptible to doing everything that they are being asked to do even when it is generally not in their scope of work or expertise. It is like they are not able to say “ No” in fear of offending others and burning themselves out in the process under the license of “doing God’s work/serving the people” or they are the “one stop help centre” for everything and everyone.
To me, that is a saddening but truthful fact. Church workers spouses, partners and even family members often crave for more time to be together or even doing things together. I am agreeable that working in church or any other religious establishment is not an occupation. If it was, then all of us would be in trouble. It does take a very special passion, commitment, the calling and lots of love to do it but sometimes, they are, more often than not, a rather neglected lot in a way.
However, in saying all this, I am all for working alongside God as a co-worker thing is equally important. I believe, the older need to shepherd the younger and open communication are vital in God’s ministry today. There has to be mutual respect while goodwill must prevail in every aspect of our lives. As always, there are things one can do while there are things one cannot do. So, as the pastors and church workers takes care of our needs, wants and demands, who takes care of them? If we are going to push it back to GOD, I believe, we do need to open up our horizons more or have our head examined , be wiser and be considerate. Yes, what I am saying is that, we , the general congregation are sometimes the reason for the pain, suffering, affliction and burnt out feeling of our church workers including pastors too at times.. We need to be considerate and understanding in many ways lest we will lead our church workers to the threshold of exhaustion - physically, mentally and socially.
I just asked of the people to not ask too much nor expect too much of the church workers. Give them a break because sometimes, the responsibilities they have to bear and carry are so heavy on their small shoulders. Their voices, aspirations, thoughts and even their grouses are often suppressed for the “greater good of the people” and their hardwork and dedication are mainly overlooked or considered as mandatory or expected of them. Give them some space to breathe and to flourish in their own way through the tasks ahead of them. I believe, we do need to be aware so that our church workers would not burnt out or washed out.
I am merely reminding us all that we are all just human being with our own limitations as GOD enables us. I know, I know, you don’t need to brandish your sharp parang and knives to remind me of what I am saying. The church workers are a special breed of people and “God would enable them “ but we really need to have that clear understanding of their limitations and etiquette of life as well.
I believe, striking a right balance in life is important. For a full time church worker, there is hardly time to get things done and so much to do with so limited time in hand. Thereby, it would be good if one takes a good look about meaningful living. You see, God can use it all in any situation in life. A trip, a conversation, an awkward scenario or even an unexpected occurrence could lead to one sharing of our faith. I guess, God is the arranger of that sort of opportunities. So, let us continue to be a blessing to one another, shall we?
