A Walk....

Today like any other morning of the week, I had a walk in the park. It’s the Melaka Botanical Garden and yes, I have been exercising and trying to get myself not to collapse somewhere and give hard times to the family. ( Yeah, I have tried very hard not to be morbid for heaven’s sake but I can’t help it. Sorry!).  Yeah, I have been conscious of my health some time back and ever since retiring, it has been good being able to exercise after such a long time of lockdowns, shutdowns and whatever downs that had been implemented.

Since hearing the sad news of a friend being in great sickness, I guess, my thoughts are with my friend and the family. Though I have not seen the family for quite some time, due to the lockdowns and so on,  my silent prayers are always with them eventhough,  I, too, struggled with my own set of worries, daily fixing of problems and struggles in my heart and mind. ( Do you realized that sometimes, life problems and circumstances just piled on you after you finish solving one? Arrrrgggghhhhhhhhh! )  I guess, I have hidden a lot of my struggles to myself and that’s why I do a lot of things in great silence. I guess, hearing the sad news earlier does prick my heart a lot and I really struggled today. I guess, walking down the route in the park today, being physically tired and chalking up more steps and distance were the furthest from my mind. Even though I know that I would be tired at three quarters of the way of my walk but today, I was still full of energy and posing lots of questions in my heart and mind to God. At the end of the walk, I was physically and mentally drained, I must admit. It was supposed to be “free and easy” but somehow, it didn’t feel like that but I still chalk up my distance, though. There are still positives, though, about the walk today. 

As the morning breeze glided past my chubby face, receeding hairline and ruffling my already short hair, I could not help but admire the beauty of my surrounding. Sure, it’s a secondary jungle and almost barren of wild animals but the tall trees, rustling leaves and the gentle morning dew does invigorate your soul, yunno. I guess, my walks in the park had always been praising God, prayer of blessings for my family and friends while occasionally, putting up “ I want” list to God. Feeble-minded human, right? I must say that walking in the park experience haven’t always been good always. During the walks, sometimes, you get the opportunity to smell a lot of ammonia like smell (usually from animals) , dead wood smell and sometimes, unpleasant body odor from fellow walkers! But there are times, you get sweet smelling perfumes, cut grass smell ( I love that smell! ) and even some real nice scent of raw plants. So, it is a sight, feel and smell experience when you take a walk in the park or a botanical garden, on this occasion. To me, the lush green and majestic trees are a sight to behold. I guess, in years to come with the present government we are having, we will one day experienced all this in a museum only! So much cutting down of tree even in a secondary jungle or so-called jungle lar! Of all the experiences thus far, listening to the chirping of the birds had been the most soothing for me amidst the call of the monkeys and the rough rummaging of the wild boars. There was once, about a few months back, I saw the sight of a mama wild boar and her two small babies and I really believe that it was a rare sighting indeed.

Coming back to the walks, I must say that the terrain ain’t a bad one nor challenging but it can be for some. To me, I do struggle a bit from time to time but I do genuinely enjoy the walk as I could sort of “throw” off my questions to God. I guess, I am eccentric in the sense that I would lift my hands to praise God whenever I reached a certain destination and at the end of the destination. I would always proclaimed “ God, you are so good ! Thank you for allowing me to finish my walk today and getting you off the hook for listening to me today!“ at the end of every walk before I meet up with my their other half of my challenge in life! Hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Naughty! Naughty! Definitely NO breakfast today! All in all, I would fulfil my walk quota of 1 ½ turn round the park equating about 6km walk, I believe. To me, that is liberating and fun at the same time despite the huffing and puffing!

Jokes aside, walking in the park is just not for the exercise your body needs but somehow, it can be quite enriching in life too. I realized a good smile, a greeting of “Good morning” and a simple nod of acknowledgement of fellow walkers does brighten up not just their day but yours too. Somehow, it is a simple gesture of politeness but the echoes of that humble act rings and ripples far and wide results. It just warms the heart and I guess, a lot of us failed to realise that, right? So, come on, put a smile on your face and make it a good day for someone else, will you? Take out the sulkiness and replace it with a great big warm smile the next time you are walking in the park or any park for that matter. It doesn’t matter if these walkers or joggers are strangers. Some of them might just need a little kindness or some form of positivity for the start of the day. So, go out there and give them one, you hear?

Some of the questions that I keep asking God in my walks are, “ Why are you taking the good people away and leaving us with the “not so good “ ones to deal with, huh?” , “why does evil  thrive in our society today?” and “what do you want from me, God? “ Boy! I do have loads of questions , I tell you. I guess, these are my own genuine questions. I am not a scholar nor a genius in any way but just another simple minded man who do have questions like that in my mind. I am passionate about those questions and yet, I do feel that I am so far behind in understanding of the Lord’s domain.  In every of my sinful nature, I still humbly ask forgiveness from God every day of my life. Maybe, you will say that I am just being silly but I genuinely want to know. I guess, I will only get the answer when I get to above, right? Well, the fact remains that these are questions that are so relevant in our lives today. I couldn’t care less about money and that’s the furthest thing from my mind, if you know me but I can’t get around these questions. 

Yunno, I often marveled when I read the Bible of how God used to commune with the people directly and some people hearing from God directly during the ancient times. Is it happening in our generation? Yunno, how my soul longed for that audible voice from God ! I often asked the question too, “Am I that sinful and wretched, Lord that you won’t even whisper to me?” Yeah, it bugged me a lot and I start to pour over the internet searching for commentaries, reading the Word and reading more. I truly want to listen to God and hear from Him alone rather than going through all the nicks, turns and corners of questions and more questions. I guess, we all always wanted quick fix solutions, right? Yunno what, I came to realise that Mary did the right thing- sitting quietly and listening intently to every word of the Lord. Sometimes, we “rushed” so much and we failed miserably. We really need to wait patiently and pour over the Word again and again seeking the real meaning of  the Word and scripture. More often than not, we pick out the Word or scripture that suits us and our understanding when we should understand the purpose and intention intended by the Lord. We are a generation of laziness! Laziness in our reading and understanding of the Lord’s Word. We need to really ask the Lord to help us understand and deepened our soul to the Word and open our mind to think deeper and with more understanding of the context. That’s why I am grateful to be able to do my searches and teaching of the Word whenever possible as it gives me the opportunity to look up further and learn the Word with better understanding and in better depth of realization to the Word. Yes, I would suggest you do the same indeed. 

Right, that’s my thoughts after a walk in the park. It ain’t Einstein eureka moment, yunno but just another passionate walk in the park with a very passionate God too, I guess.