My Woman....

We all heard and loved inspirational stories and how they could help us re-live or get inspired in life. Well, I have one for you today. This is the story of woman who inspired me through the years. That woman is Wang Soon Ling. ( Aiyoo....dare not mention any other names or else.....become sup ayam potong-potong,okay?) She is my better half and partner in life for the past 25 years and come 18th November, it will be her birthday. 

Let me tell you a little something about SL. She is truly a remarkable mother to my children and she has been a great support in my life. When it comes to finance, she is as tight as a close-knitted dress but needed as we needed to budget for our commitment to the children's studies and all that. On top of that, she is patient and kind. She seemed and look aloof at times but she is actually a very nice person when you get to know her. She is unusually witty at times and caring in many ways. I remembered when I was in the hospital , she did not leave my side mainly because I could have signed off suddenly but then again she was there right to the very end - praying or was it sleeping? Hahahahahaaaaaaaaa......either way, it was good for her. 

Through the years, she has been quite a woman of faith and strength. She took heart to the promises of the Lord and she keeps faith in our family well-being. She took care of the family's needs, laundry, house cleaning and most chores in the house and she was such a strength. Many times, I marvelled at her for she took it upon herself to ensure I was comfortable and relaxed while we ate dinner quietly or even in my troubled time, she was there to comfort me. Whenever she was angry, it would be days before I am able to speak to her but then again, there is some peace and quiet at last....hahahahahhahaaaaaaaaaaaaa........Seriously, whenever she gets angry, it would be for some reason of interest and though sometimes, she can be quite adoring when she is angry. Most of  time, the source of her anger would be me as I would be the main culprit of her discomfort. Anyway, it is definitely good for either one of us to defuse when the other is on the verge of exploding!!!!  Yeah, over the years, we have our difficulties and hardship along the way but we've always supported one another , cared for one another and comforted one another no matter what the situation would be.  

Most of the time, SL is quiet and she does her stuff quietly and without complaint. The only time I saw her so stressed up was when she did her marking on the PT3 test papers and all the rest of the junk stuffs the blundering buffoons in the Education Ministry dumps on the teachers! A good hug and a dose of comfort helped a long way in getting her back to perspective. It took her days and nights to finish the test scripts and she seemed happy enough at the end of the day. She is dedicated to her work and she is a good, dedicated and dotting mother. The children benefited a lot from her as she speaks to them. Somehow, she becomes an inspiration to them as they move on in the lives. 

SL is a loving and caring person. Sure, she has her meltdowns at times just like any other woman as they also needed to be "sayang" la....but overall, she really is a loving and caring person. I guess, no one know her better than I do, right? She has been inspirational to me and the children. She prays for her friends and colleagues who would often asked her for prayers eventhough they are of different faith & religion .I am so proud of her as she does what she does for her colleagues and friends. The other day, when we visited her colleague's husband, she told me that she felt burdened to pray for her colleague's husband and she just asked her colleague about it. She then said her prayers to her colleague's husband as I laid my hand on his shoulder. It was great to see her exercise her warmth, love and faith to others. That is what so special about SL. I couldn't have asked for a better person as my wife and partner in life. So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY,my dear , SOON LING! 

It's 25 years!

Someone told me long ago that marriage is a covered dish and you will never know what you will get in it until you go through that length of experience in marriage that you would finally understand. For me, I am still understanding it and still find it puzzling after all these years despite being in this collaboration and institution for such a long time. Compared to some who had more experience than I have, I find that each year I am still in the learning mode about my marriage and the very institution that drove some many to the walls of craziness, despair and pain while to some it can be rewarding , happiness and joy. 

My little story started 27 years ago at that hallway at the former Maktab Perguruan Lembah Pantai in Kuala Lumpur  ( The teaching college no longer exist present day ) when a scrawny, thin, fragile looking young woman equipped with an old squarish bag ( I came to know that it was her father's travelling bag years later ) stood rooted together with some freshies ( young aspirt teachers in making ) during the Orientation Day in 1987.  Like any good "senior" fella , I was in the Orientation Committee and I scouted around for a while for suitable friendly friend but somehow, that scrawny looking woman in Wang Soon Ling caught my attention so much. Say what you wanted but to me, it was love at first sight, I must insist but then she did not know me nor knew of what would have happened then, right? Somehow, I courted her and the memories of it were so funny though but we really had some good times together while in college. The stories wouldn't have fitted the pages though.....we were young then..... Soon, my days were up in college and I had to leave to Sabah for my deployment of work there and it was goodbye again.  

By then , we had been close and we would write to each other faithfully and I would be back during the holidays to be with her. Those were the good ol' days and it was really fun. Soon, it was time for me to tie the knot as it would be the right thing to do to make a decent woman out of SL and I did it in 15th November, 1989. It was the happiest day in my life and it was also dad's happiest day as his son was finally getting married!!!! But we would still be apart as SL was doing her teaching practical in KL and soon got her posting in Old Klang Road .  By that time, I flew back to Sabah to teach while she taught in KL for two years. We were apart for two years and the distance did not make us feel parted at all as we constantly wrote to one another. Yeah, love was so much simpler, easier and faithful in many ways. There weren't complicated issues nor head banging headaches to deal with. I must admit it was much easier then and the main thing was that life was so much simpler, actually. It only gets complicated as we grow older..........hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa............yeah, old people think a lot......hahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa.....

I remembered the day I broke the news to mom & dad that I have a girlfriend in SL. They gasped and fell silent for a while. Out of the blue, Dad broke the silence and said in a jest, " You are sure that there is someone who actually wants you? ". Mom then chipped in , " Yeah, you mean there is a woman who actually like you?". I didn't find it insulting nor amusing but it hurt a bit la...hahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa...... I am sure my mother-in-law would have been in a greater shock, I presume! But those are the popshots in life that one would not forget.

So, year after year, we trudged along bringing into light two wonderful children in JWee and SYuen and doing our best as partners in life and responsible parents.  I guess, from friends to partners to married couple to parenthood to two older folks now, we have gone through so much thick and thins together. I must admit, it is not a bed of roses or a straight path for us all along. There are many thorns, scrapnels of fiery quarrels, knives, hurtings and tears too. There are true days of pain, days of turbulence and trials in our road together but together, SL & I have weathered through it for the past 25 glorious years. It took a lot of patience, a huge dose of love, massive prayers and a strong heart to make our relationship work. It is not a fly by night process nor a quick fix remedy for all your problems. I must say, being silent, lots of prayers and a lot of silent tears helped to make the relationship a better one. It made us better people in life and it made us realised that being together helped us weather this hardship easier than any other days. 

As I looked at my bread the other day, I realised that as I spread the butter on one side, I then took the strawberry jam that I made on my own and spread it on another piece of bread. As I put the two slices of bread together , they tasted sweet, smooth, slightly sour and fragrant ( I added rum and vanilla extract to the strawberry jam when I made it! ). That what my life had been with SL for the past 25 years. I must be the first to admit that I am not a good husband yet and that's why I am still in the learning and refining process of being one. I try my best each day to be who I really am and what I want to do in my life with SL.

To Soon Ling, CHEERS , babe for 25 years of bliss, fun, love and togetherness! Here's to the next 25 years IF we can still reach that far la...... hahahahahhahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!  

Ashley is FIVE!

I've always enjoyed the times when I get to celebrate Ryan or Ashley birthday as these two young fellas surely bring a lot of joy to my heart. Last week, we celebrated Ashley's birthday and the theme was "Frozen". I guess, I must take my hats off in admiration and all gratitude to Ashley's parents, Wei & Jade ( my brother -in-law and sister-in-law ) for really taking the trouble in making it a really nice birthday party for their daughter, Ashley.

As my colleague wanted to exchange /switch working weekends with me, SL and I travelled back earlier and managed to join in Ashley McD party with her friends. If I am not mistaken, there were about 11 of them joining in the party together with some parents. From the very first 5 year old that arrived at the party, I told myself " Oh! Oh! here comes trouble!!!! " I can safely tell you this - those 5 year olds and younger ones can be a handful and heart /lungs stoppers too! They have energy level like some raging bulls on steroids while their actions, words and minds can be quite filled with TVB crime busters series moves!     

I guess, when you have a kid's birthday party, the best thing to do is to get out of their way but "Smart Alec" me and SL tried our best to accommodate them at the McD children's indoor playground and what a wrong move we did!!! They trampled, jumped, flew, squeezed, raged and even "fight" with one another as they slid down the tube tunnel. I thought these are gonna be "nice" children as their grandparents & parents sent them off but alas, after the "coast" is clear - all hell broke loose,man! Sincerely, I must say , it was fun to see children being children but it was sad if you could identify just how much TVB series had influenced the children's mind, actually. There are , of course, some very well mannered children and they are a great joy to play with especially the girls la..... The boys were "hopelessly" drowned in their games of "beating the daylights" out of each other and  I thought, WWF Wrestle Mania is child's play, man when it comes to these boys! You should have seen some of the piledriver moves, head butts, armpit squeezer and leg pin moves! Anyway, it was fun being with the children and Jade's mom baked some very creative and delicious cupcakes indeed! The cupcakes were inspiring and very nice to eat. 

That day, to control my nerves ( hahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa......) I had a cup of Cappuccino and a cup of Americano as I faced the daunting task of playing with the energetic children. Of course, I was careful not to get my nuts being kicked by these young ones because you never know when they get into a frenzy of Bruce Lee act, right? All in all, it was a great birthday bash and everyone had a great time that day. For me, seeing both Ryan and Ashley and spending time with them made me very happy. After all, children are  the  real delight and a joy to the home. They are simple, honest, truthful and say things as they see fit with no malice intended. They speak from their hearts and out of their innocence. So, love your children and teach them to love God too. Cheers!

Beans Cafe.....

The other day, I was having some coffee time at Doi Chaang Cafe and it was quite relaxing. I guess, in a mad rush world we live in, it is always good to slow down and just enjoy the simpler things in life. It was interesting that as I look at the simple drawn art on the wall of the cafe, I noted with interest that the meaning of "doi chaang" simply means "elephant mountain" in Thai. I then asked myself if this is gonna be one of those "from the behind matter" or simply put as "ass matter" flowing from the behind of the elephants that I am sipping!!!! Reading on, my anxiety calmed down considerably as further explanation confirmed that the coffee beans came from the coffee plants at the chilly mountains of Chiang Rai, Thailand and not from some animal's backside! That's all that matters to me, actually. Feel kinda gross if I am sipping some droppings from some animal, you know what I mean. It is not that I have not had such coffee before but in reality I do really enjoy a good cuppa coffee from the tree and processed properly for once.

I did not order my usual Americano double shot but instead I chose the Iced Doi Chaang instead while the rest took the Iced Melon, Iced Green Tea, Flat White and Errol had Americano double shot instead. I find my Iced Doi Chaang to be quite alright but I would rather have the robust and strong coffee taste, actually. I kinda miss my Starbucks Americano in many ways but some say, a burnt coffee beans gives you that bitter, burnt aromatics volume to it. I just dunno, some people love that while others love the subtle onslaught on a mild tasting coffee. Me, I am all for the robust, burnt and bitter sweet coffee taste. It's ...............coffee la.....

Anyway, while the coffee was alright, the company with family and friends were equally alright. I just love the break for the moment and I guess every one should have their own breaks. It would do you a whole world of a good, actually. It was at this time that Errol who suggested that why don't we try to run a cafe then.The idea sound absurd at first but as we talked on, it seemed so viable and doable. Sure, it got it drawbacks and so on but the prospect of owning our own business eventhough it will be a partnership is truly and invigorating thought. The thought warms the mind, the heart and even the head as far as I was concerned. Yup, they sound so inspiring and so challenging that it tingles my senses of wanting to try something out and just do it.

Nearing 50, spurned, twisted, wringed, hung out,  dried & fried by working our ass off with horrendously ridiculous bosses and deadlines plus ever prevailing sickening thoughts of burying someone under the six feet of gravel grounds ( that's me lar..... ), working a cafe is a welcomed thought. I was already thinking of doing the scones, the cinnamon rolls and even getting some nice cakes from enthusiastic home cooks to show case their culinary baking skill. Yeah, I really thought of giving opportunity to talented people to sell off their products like good ol' nice kaya, home made jams and home made goodness as these are served with breads or other nice fares. Yeah, I would love to bake my own bread and showcase them in the cafe, man.

Yeah, that really got me excited and I guess, a good cup of coffee does make a great day. Yunno, if I do own a cafe one day, the first thing I wanna do after establishing the business is to implement the "Bless a Cuppa" program. I have read about this cafe somewhere who would served coffee and food to the poor or needy by having a take away from them. One of the cafe proprietors implemented this campaign after having the satisfaction of seeing the impact of a customer who paid for the coffee and bun for one of the poor on the street. So, the proprietor started this program whereby customers can participate in helping the poor by buying their coffee and food plus pay/sponsor a cup or bun for the poor or needy who will walk into the shop. This is the way society gives back to the people. How it works is that the poor would asked if there is a sponsored coffee or  bun. If there is none, then, he gets nothing but if there is someone who had paid for the program then the poor takes back a cup of coffee and a bun. Wouldn't that be sweet? You'll probably say that I am little bit crazy or loco , right coz' Malaysian will always be poor, right? Well, I really believe this is workable, man. Kinda have to make sure that the coffee and buns go to the right people, that's all. We have too may kiasus and "free makan minded" people in this country who will just take everyone for a ride or make us all a sucker , right? Well, I guess, we'll just have to be wise as one walks in and ensure that they do not "rob" the genuine poor. Hate these type of cheapskates!

I believe my cafe would appeal both to the young and old. Anyway, I feel elated and nice thinking if I could own a cafe together with my fellow friends. Honestly,  I know nuts about running a cafe but I am willing to learn hard for the trade.I guess, in life, we all need dreams to stay alive in our heart, body, mind and soul. Yeah, I would be surprised if I take that chance to open up a cafe but it is one good dream indeed. What do you think?