Office Anatomy...

While I praised my office ladies yesterday for their hearts, today, I am going to dissect the office mentality in general. This article is not meant for specified individuals or group of people but it is mainly done in satirical look of the daily mentality of the working people in the office. The office is generally divided into the management, the wanna-be management, the kulis and of course, the clerical staff.
While management are usually people who had been sitting the seat for donkey odd years in that position ; lifting their butt off the chair seemed hard to do nowadays except for breaks, teas, lunches, golf and great pleasures from full anatomy massage you can think off. But there are exceptions to certain people who seemed to work their socks off ; forgetting they have families or even a life to begin with. Somehow, life seemed "hard " for them for they lead a team of people who needed their "expertise" in experience and technical know how thingy. So, that's why they stay up there in the management rung. I must say that the management crew are usually made up of the cream of the crop and had mastered the articulate cum masterful stroke of taichinism and seamnism of the highest level. Quite a good handful of these masters had attained the spiritual nirvana, the highest order available in the art of taichinism & seamnism. As always, there are exceptionally great managers out there who really helped out the team and they deserve good praise as well. Only those with a heart will understand the predicament faced by the bottom rung food chain hierarchy at work place.

Then there's the management "wanna be". Well, these group of people are usually so ambitious that they become as blind as a bat and numb to the feelings of the people around them. All they care is just to suck up to the management team, mentally inclined towards blind allegiance to certain individuals, usually have a lot of experience and expertise but refuses to share for fear of losing their knowledge ( Sigh! The very Chinese mentality! ) , somewhat duty shirkers, gave a lot of 5 sen & 10 sen face when given duties, lots of suggestions and does a lot of apple polishing stuff. We call these people the "wayang kakis". These wanna-be are usually easily noticeable by their ways of answering questions with answer like " Why?", " Yes, maybe", " I don't know", "I can't remember"," I agree with you", " I don't have the statistics" , " How to do this, arh?"or simply give you a 100% stupid blank face. Sure, they know the answer but they just "pan sor" [ play stupid as they say it in the Cantonese dialect] when asked for their opinions, directions or sharing of information. I would say too that the people in this bracket are usually highly paid for their head knowledge but has lousy heart knowledge. Other than that, they are great drinkers and hu-ha number making crowd, lousy in pulling out/slow in pulling out their wallet to make payments and often don't do what they say. Pulling in big figures when it comes to year end production [ mainly because they stab everybody in the back or send somebody in some body bag somewhere! ] , make believe that they work the hardest in the organisation or gloat that they are given a lot of expertise work when they actually do nothing much when they have the professional qualifications for it. Sure, they also contribute to the well-being of the company and works as hard for the production. Arr......but all for a reason........better pay , less work and hide oneself when work crunch is round the corner.

Then, there's the kulis. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh................one would think that they are the most hardworking lot. Well, I've got news for you. These are sometimes some of the craftiest, laziest and sometimes craziest lot of all. Their excuses for not coming to work or don't want to do work is totally an artistic blend of craftiness, inexcusable solemn literature and con artistry of the highest level. Yes, they worked hard as usual but they complained a lot at times. They complained from A to Z from management to the very bottom of the food chain including the cleaning Ah Soh. Nothing is pleasing to them except themselves at times. But when it comes to work, this is the same lot that gets a lot of work done too. This lot are the ones that sometimes make or break a company's year end production. Money is their priority while money is never enough is their lifetime motto while going out of the office door on time is equally important too. There is a good blend of experience and not so experience individuals in this group and hey, it's a jungle out there. It is still the survival of the fittest when it comes to getting more work or getting less work.

Then, it's the clerical staff. It is always "money not enough at all" even though their bank accounts may be overflowing with money from their children or even their spouses. This is a mixture of pretty but not so bright head or not so young but efficient in work or pretty and can work or down right dumb-dumb. Yup, these are the Oscar Award category under the clerical staff rung. They are without doubt some of the most important people in the company and sometimes, the most hardworking ones. Anyway, you can normally see through them when doing two tasks. Your career depended on them in a way. Firstly because they answer phone calls and secondly, because they type your works. If they screw up on the first two jobs, you are as good as dead in your career. Imagine if your clerk answers the phone , " Yellow, who you want to speaking to ar?", "Ah?", " So?" or " what you say ar?" Imagine the other ruckus they can cause in your life. Well, don't mess with the clerical staff,man! Some of the good and dedicated staff are in this bracket while some are just wasting their natural raw talents [ bitching and gossiping ] in this rung. If you look at their clothings, make up and time for gossip, you can imagine what they can do to your job sheet. I would sometimes categorised this group as pleasantly working individuals. Money is everything and anything in this category. They would tell you that they don't have time at all at home, feint poor financial constraints, having to do house work and so on but some just spend times yakking away or planning for the next facial/manicure/hair appointment [ as though the face is going to get any younger! I doubt it very much actually but I may be wrong, right? ]. Step right up folks! These are some of the observations that I have seen from experiences far and wide. Like I said, I may be wrong in my observations or you may add your own and make it more fun. Afterall, we live in a mad mad world today while an excuse is still an excuse no matter how flowery you may put it!

So, fancy being in any of these groups?!~