1AhLong

I was having my usual tea break when my colleague passed me a rather pleasant looking pamphlet and had me in tatters of laughters when I read it's contents! Gosh! Ah Long has gone high-tech and ........"humane" in that sense. The title read " Skim Pinjaman Segera" and at the bottom of the front, it read, " Kami sedia menolong anda pada bila-bila masa." As you flip the pamphlet further you wil see a pretty hazel haired lady with a bundle of US dollars [ why can't they get local girls to wave a bunch of Malaysian ringgits - this I can't understand! ] and a whole bunch of words plus the contact number which I had oblirated from the picture.

As you flip the inside of the pamphlet, a nice background picture of a small plant on a hand definitely will catch your eyes and attention followed by the types of loans available both in BM and the Mandarin language. Fuuyooh! Ah Long also gone ballistic with a sense of "safe the environment" mode, man!

I'll tell you this, the Ah Long corporations have heeded our nation's call to be united in one solidarity brotherhood of men & women, of course, to build an environment friendly situation to launder money, bringing perfect misery when you can't pay your debts and of course, hand out dog chains so that you can pee and pooh in the modified parks call rooms! Yup, they have gone a long way from the olden days of beating you to pulp when you can't pay your loans to a more sophisticated and "creative" approach of recalling loans - they take your car, your house, beautify your house walls with Jotun or Kansai weathershield creative colors code paints or even make you an overnight well-known celebrity by peddling photos of your well-built body and of course, they held " fiery ceramahs" at your house every other night so that neighbours will know that you are being supported as the next candidate for GE13, of course!

Now you know the reason why people just love to patron the unofficial "friendly" neighbourhood banking corporations we have in our streets today. Go ahead and make a date with these people. Give away your house grant, your car registration card , a copy of your IC, bank books and all that are neccessary for you to secure a loan in these difficult economic times. Afterall, if the local banks can't provide you the necessary loans for you to start your business or make you stay afloat in these difficult time, these "thoughtful" corporations could well help you. That's why with higher inflation rate, increase in food prices, raise in petrol prices, lips service from politicians & local councillors and all the elections & all the erections has made these corporation aware of our needs and they are the willing "helper" at this time of hard times. So, go ahead, recruit help from your politicians, afterall, their signature can't get you to get a loan from the local banks, no harm getting their signatures & support can help you secure a loan from the 1AhLong corporation, right?

To me, it's a farce when you talk about personal loans, SME loans or even business loans today. It is always who you know , which cable do you have to pull and what do you have to offer. Right? Or is it wrong? Hmmmmmnnnnnnn.....................