I wonder....

A few mornings ago,  I received an email from one STS ( Sabah ) student who sent a heartfelt email thanking my friends and I for our contribution to his studies. In fact, the monies collected will go a long way to pay for his study fees. As I sat there reading the mail, I will never know what our contribution had meant to that person but I guess, it will make a difference in his life as a servant of God who had pursued a calling from God to be equipped with the Word and served in one of the remote areas in Sabah. Like I have said so many times, I have given out much without complain over the years; be it my finance, my resources , my talents or whatever is available to me , as they say it, but it has never stop me nor my friends from giving for the right purpose/cause. Giving for the right purpose /cause is important and that's a fact. More importantly, I have always asked myself, are we giving with the right heart attitude? Many a times, people in authority always use the phrase "God loves a cheerful giver" to ransom our thoughts but the truth of the matter is that both the attitude of the giver and receiver are of great importance.I don't know about you but it is important to me that the receiver receives my givings with much gratitude and use the help given responsibly and with great accountability just as I give whole-heartedly with expectations that it has helped the receiver being blessed. You may say this is far-fetched but think about it. Didn't God expect that from us - just as He gives life to us to be in this world? We continue to shudder and hide in our cloak of pretentious concoction of what we call life and then say that we should not be too critical of what we have given away and que sera sera- what will be, will be. What I am saying is simply that being accountable, doing things with integrity, responsible and gratitude are virtues that should be possessed by both the giver and the receiver. Mind you, I am not talking about just finances but virtually every aspect of our lives - be it in our time, our resources, our talents, our sacrifice and even the little things we contribute.

That is why we live in perpetual ruins when  we continue to lose this perspective of life. We see spiritual foundations being set up like some money making organisation with some big shot self proclaimed status quo of CEO, set of arrogant, bungling & self-proclaimed advisors aided by apple polishing, nit-wit supporters. Alas, we have many little Napoleons running our spiritual foundation these days. Interestingly, we all know from history that Napoleon did win many battles with a lot of bloodshed, gripped of fear and he created pain, anguish and slaughtered the lives out of so many out of his own indulgence and hunger for power and craze to stay in power. In simple words, he created his own ghost and monster. Even in his latter years, he was even afraid of his own shadow for that matter. His advisors and cohorts were no better than him.They have created a monster in Napoleon by feeding to his whims, fancies and sugary diabetic-laced with death ideas & proposals. Earlier in history, the down fall of King Louis XVI and the bloodied iron-clutched hands of Maximilien Robespierre and Jacobins did nothing to teach Napoleon nor the people to walk through that path again. Well, the country was bankrupt and left in ruins. The very institution of the country collapsed and the poor rebelled bringing many to the cold steel of the horizontal blade.  These advisors fed his ego, his eccentricity, sugary-coated advices and simply wormed through the ladder of the establishment by throwing the genuine leaders off the ladders. In simple terms, these leaders created a monster they could not control or is it that the monster itself was already having its own tentacles of power at its side. Sadly enough, these web of deceits caused an upraising amongst the people and like they say, the rest is history. Heads rolled onto the receiving baskets as the glistening guillotine runs its course along the back neckline severing the pulsating arteries and the thick base of the neck. We all could learn a thing or two from history lessons at times. The interesting part, none were spared while Napoleon was sent to exile in Elba hence the famous quip, " Able was I ere I saw Elba". Interestingly enough , if you read it straight and backwards, it is the same phrase. It only shows the manipulative intelligence level of the adversary we face each day as leaders like this stays at the top of their game each time.

I am sad for the fact that blind allegiance of leadership sometimes will create a monster in itself. Past glories can be a learning point for striving to do better but never a yardstick for success. If we scream at the top of our lungs that grace is new each day , why can't our actions and attitude shows the same instead of continuing to do the same offence day in, day out? Hurts are real. Anger is real and people stepping out of our religious foundation is real. Everyone to his/her own reason of leaving but the manner of leaving is important. If one left on an extremely hurtful note, how could God's foundation be glorified or is it good riddance to bad rubbish mentality by the already weakening and slimy leadership? There has to be a re-conciliation of where has the point gone wrong. Two parallel points do not meet while humbleness and willingness to listen will help a long way. An arrogant attitude, a harsh word or even a distasteful action can scar people for life. We all live on a fragile line of humility, mentality and sanity. When a religious foundation which is suppose to help us grow in our spirituality fails to even address such attitudes, where else would the hurt, the spiritually-bashed up and even the victims go to get their healing when the very healing foundation they go to is the one ripping them apart week after week? The obvious answer is they walk out from one foundation to another foundation and the roller coaster ride begins all over again because the baggages are not cleared in the first place. Lives are lost while I pray that lives will be healed and restored by the action of re-conciliation and the willingness to push aside pride, egoism and even wishful thinking.

Until and unless affirmative corrective measures are administered, I see that the very human institution we have called the religious foundation will fall to pieces. Leaving congregation is real. Hurting congregation is real. "Divide & Conquer" tactics are real. Blame shifting is equally real. Tiring charades and puppetry skills are real too. Empty promises and talks are real & unvisionary while  blundering arrogance had been the order of the day. When will it all end? I wonder....... I really wonder....