There are days you loathe because you have bad days and so on while there are days you are jumping up and down some over-energized 5 year old with a brand new toy in hand. We all have days like that and we wish that the days would be like the 5 year olds having a time of his/her life. The fact of the matter as we grow up physically, mentally and socially, we all have to do split decisions in our lives especially in a fast fast world we live in. Some are so extremely fast that we don't have time to think and that's where the danger lies. There are some decision or situation we assess that may be correct at that time and seen so wrong afterwards. I was caught in one of that situation.
I must admit that I am not Mister-Know-It-All and I am genuinely as flawed as any other human being. I honestly try to live my life the best way I know how and I don't give a two hoots on what people think of me or perceived of me. That's the very least of my problem, actually. You see, I want to be as genuine as possible with people and I want to live with a clear conscience in my life. If I have to hurt people along the way for being truthful, I will do it because that's the only way I know how. Forgive me for my sometimes crude, unpolished and not-so-sweet way of putting things across. I believe not in sugar-coating what I say or feed sweeteners to people who talk to me. I have always said this and I will say it again - what you see is what you get. What I am trying to say is that I am far from perfect and if I do mistakes, I am MAN enough to own up and say I am sorry. No two ways about it as far as I am concerned.
The other day I was in a situation that was rather disturbing. At one glance, I had fallen to the greatest fallacy of my own - Assumption without my usual investigative works. Normally, I would weigh and consider a lot of matters but the processor in my head and heart was way too fast. I had outrightly broken the very first principle I had set for myself which is Assume Nothing! It disturbed me a lot and instaneously, I was bashed with a tidal wave of shame and a load of burden. I had done what I ought not to do and I felt the burden immediately. I could not but felt pain in my heart and I couldn't even connect with the Lord that had been my greatest rock in life. I lay awake each night without fail and I bow down at the feet of my Maker seeking the redemption of peace. I shed tears at the service of my Lord and I really felt sorry for the situation I was in and for the people too. I tossed and turned on my bed seeking rest and sleep but knowing in my heart what I had to do after hours on my knees pleading to my Maker for some signs of comfort. I guess, in many ways, I had been comforted by the balm of healing from the Lord. I made amends by speaking to the people involved in my situation and I do hope my explanation and advises are suffice. I DO care for the people that are involved in my situation and getting them hurt is furthest from my mind. I just hope they understand that.
So, I want to genuinely apologise to the people who are involved in my situation and I say again that I'm SO SORRY. At least, I owned up and man enough to know I am wrong when I am wrong. This is not justification of my actions but rather a wake-up call for me to more thorough with my head and heart before I assume anything. It is never easy for me to see people hurt eventhough outwardly I can be very harsh if I want to. Bah! It has nothing to do with my age as well as I have been consistently sharp, bold and sometimes looked cruel when and if I need to. Like I said, I don't give a two hoots! My stand is crystal clear - If I am wrong , I will apologise but if I am right, I will stand up boldly. We all have to make a stand somewhere, someday , somehow in our lives and I DID, a long long time ago! Looking forward to more solace in the Word!
The other day I was in a situation that was rather disturbing. At one glance, I had fallen to the greatest fallacy of my own - Assumption without my usual investigative works. Normally, I would weigh and consider a lot of matters but the processor in my head and heart was way too fast. I had outrightly broken the very first principle I had set for myself which is Assume Nothing! It disturbed me a lot and instaneously, I was bashed with a tidal wave of shame and a load of burden. I had done what I ought not to do and I felt the burden immediately. I could not but felt pain in my heart and I couldn't even connect with the Lord that had been my greatest rock in life. I lay awake each night without fail and I bow down at the feet of my Maker seeking the redemption of peace. I shed tears at the service of my Lord and I really felt sorry for the situation I was in and for the people too. I tossed and turned on my bed seeking rest and sleep but knowing in my heart what I had to do after hours on my knees pleading to my Maker for some signs of comfort. I guess, in many ways, I had been comforted by the balm of healing from the Lord. I made amends by speaking to the people involved in my situation and I do hope my explanation and advises are suffice. I DO care for the people that are involved in my situation and getting them hurt is furthest from my mind. I just hope they understand that.
So, I want to genuinely apologise to the people who are involved in my situation and I say again that I'm SO SORRY. At least, I owned up and man enough to know I am wrong when I am wrong. This is not justification of my actions but rather a wake-up call for me to more thorough with my head and heart before I assume anything. It is never easy for me to see people hurt eventhough outwardly I can be very harsh if I want to. Bah! It has nothing to do with my age as well as I have been consistently sharp, bold and sometimes looked cruel when and if I need to. Like I said, I don't give a two hoots! My stand is crystal clear - If I am wrong , I will apologise but if I am right, I will stand up boldly. We all have to make a stand somewhere, someday , somehow in our lives and I DID, a long long time ago! Looking forward to more solace in the Word!
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