Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Stumped of words...

I want to say that I've always been able to say words of encouragement to friends, colleagues or family that are in need of them. I must confessed that the words or sentences I use may sound harsh or even downright on the verge of degrading but it is never my intention to belittle anyone. BTW, I will stand by what I say - no matter what. Honestly, I really meant well, it is just that my presentation of words may be a little difficult to digest because I don't mince my words or try to be patronisingly nice or warm. I'm just not that type of person. BTW, if you are looking for this type of patronising person, you'll never find it in me. I am a very direct person with black is black while white is white. That pretty sums up how I grew up.
That's why I was really stumped of words when I had to console a friend who was in grieve. For once in my life, I just didn't know what to say. Yes, surprise it may be, the "ever reliable" Ivan who always have some words of comfort or encouragement had nothing to say. I really wish I had but I simply don't know what to say or how to say it. For once I was really tongued-tied or is it that God wants me to listen much more intently before responding? Seriously, I really don't know. It made me question myself too in a way. What type of friend am I ? How could I have nothing to say? Have I lost my marbles or worst, have I lost my feel to care ? That were the questions that popped in my head! But one thing I know, it hurts me inside so much that it is just a pain that I simply can't describe. The only thing I remembered I did was to get on my knees and prayed for my friend and the situation my friend was in. In a certain way, I just wish I could do more. I really really wish I could do more.
I guess, sometimes, as a friend or a family , a meaningful silent is probably the best remedy for a tough situation at times. Yes, I am learning. I truly am learning!~

No comments: