A man called Dad !

When 10th September, 2008 comes, it will be a rather solemn day for me. It will be the 11th year of my dad's passing away. I still remembers how he laughs, his smiles and his silent seriousness. His passion for the "red " team [ Liverpool team ] and the kopi-o sessions. To me, Dad was my encourager. He was patient and a good listener. He never raised his voice to me nor ever laid a hand on me. I guess, that makes me respect him a lot. Being a car mechanic by profession, he had a big heart towards his customers and he made many friends. He wasn't particularly too concerned about money but he worked hard to feed our family and ensured that we had a good education. [ Yeah! The Chinese way!! ] The other thing was good ethics and good manners. That was important to him. I still remembered when he was floored by cancer ravaging his body, the first thing he did was to make mom and I promise that we would pay all his debtors ~ every last one of them was paid in full!

His debtors were mainly spare part dealers whom he had taken the parts and not paying on time. Even on the bed, he kept telling me to pay them off because these people have families to feed and that they should be paid. He made sure that mom and I would write down their names and made sure we crossed off the people after making the payments. I still remember vividly Mom making payment to one dealer who came during the bereavement sit-in during dad's funeral. Honestly, I wasn't amused at the fact that mom and I had to pay the debts because he had others who owed him on the services rendered and they did not make payments to my dad. It amounted to quite an amount actually. When I confronted him one day on this, he simply told me this, " Never mind, son. They will pay up when they have the money." That's all he said to me and mom. Well, these people did not pay up even when dad was buried.

Being the eldest in the family, I wasn't particularly his pet child [ my youngest sister was his favourite child ! ] but he made sure I knew the responsibilities I was carrying as the eldest of the family. I kept up with that responsibilities and I never forget what he taught me. I had spent a lot of my early years at his worn, messy but fun workshop working with him at the lorries/cars while he kept insisting that I stayed at home and study hard. To me, I was happier to able to spent time with dad at his workshop. I guess, I learned a lot by seeing how he talks to people, the car services he provided and the humble man he really was. I knew that he was happy that I was around to help him but he didn't want me to end up being a car mechanic. In all honesty , I am thankful for the great moral and ethical foundation he laid in my life. It stuck in me all my life.

Sure, I miss him a lot. More than you can ever imagine. He was a great father to me and he made me what I am today. I am so thankful for his pep talk when I had gone astray in my early years. He stuck by me and he never gave up on me. He proudly calls me the mechanic son and he was the happiest man when I got married because he joked with me one day that he could not imagine anyone wanting to be my girlfriend especially with the temper I have. He gave me the best wedding at that time and he was really happy for me even though I told him that I did not have enough financial resources to get married. All he told me was , " Don't worry! We'll managed!"

When my dad passed away that fateful morning, I was at work in Segamat with my colleague, Teo. I remembered rushing down from Segamat and arrived at my home feeling a deep pain in my heart. I didn't shed a single tear that day and throughout the five days of bereavement period. Maybe it hit me too much inside but on the funeral day, I wept when I saw my dad's best friends ( working buddies from nearby workshops ) honoring him with a last send-off. Many came for the funeral send-off that day. It touched my heart to know that dad's life touched so many people. I guess in many ways, I would like to be remembered that way too one day ~ a perfect send-off ! Dad, wherever you are, you're always close to my heart!~